选择去爱和凭感觉去爱具有同样强大的力量。很多时候,选择的爱才是更真实的爱,因为它并不盲目。
相爱的人,记得你们当初为何坠入爱海。学着再次去取悦那个你曾发誓要爱一辈子的人,是你的责任。
今日挑战:特意取消你平日常做的某件事,花时间和你的伴侣好好欢聚。做些他喜欢的事,或是开始某个他很想进行的计划,总之要在一起。
今晚我是只想安静看书或者做点录音什么的,可是他偏要跟我去买衣服。已经大半年没有去买衣服了,但是这说明衣橱里的衣服是够穿的。好像过了那个“女人衣橱里的衣服总是少一件”的阶段。有衣有食,便满足了,物质上的要求真是在退化了。但先生觉得有些对不起我,最近说了几次要陪我去买衣服,只是他总是匆匆忙忙,我不喜欢。
为了让他完成功课,今天我放弃了我想要的宁静夜晚,去做他以为我会喜欢的事。
我从伴侣身上发现了什么呢?发现呀,不管他看表不看表,只要他在旁边,我买衣服就是觉得有紧迫感,不如一个人慢慢逛得自在。
我的结论,再也不会要求他陪我逛街啦!除了当作惩罚手段,哈哈。
你决定放弃什么?
尽管有一个马上截止日期就要到的项目,但我还是早早下班了。我放弃的就是今晚的睡眠吧。
我带她去了女装店买新衣服,她总是没空自己去。她买得很开心,因为我没有总是看手表。这可是件大事儿,和很多夫妻一样,太太对于购物的概念让我要疯掉——我和其他很多男人一样,我的购物只是必需的时候用打猎模式去完成:进场,捕杀,离开。
她买了一些衣服,看上去还挺喜欢的。所以,我猜应该不算失败。
今天我了解到,她有时候穿我的女儿们要捐掉的T恤衫,不是因为她喜欢那些衣服,而是她更讨厌浪费。摇头,我有一个非常中国的太太。我想我应该要常常盯着她定期去买一些新衣服,哪怕这意味着我要乘她不注意的时候将她的旧衣服偷出来捐给Goodwill。
What did you decide to give up? I came home early from work despite a nasty deadline; so what I gave up was mostly sleep.
What did you do together? I took her to a ladies' clothing store at the mall so that she could buy herself some new clothes, which she never gets around to doing on her own; and did so cheerfully and without looking at my watch very often. (This is a big deal because, as is the case with many couples, my wife's approach to shopping drives me a bit nuts — like most guys, I approach shopping as a necessary evil to be approached with a hunting mindset: get in, make the kill, get out.)
How did it go? Well, she bought some clothes and seems to like them; so it presumably was not a total failure.
What new thing did you learn (or relearn) about your spouse? That she wears the T-shirts my daughters set aside to get rid of not because she like the shirts, but because she hates waste even more than she hates their old T-shirts. (shakes head) I have a very Chinese wife. I think I need to take more personal responsibility for seeing to it that she gets new clothes on a regular basis even if it means I have to sneak the old ones out to Goodwill in hopes that she won't notice.